marrying a girl with a past islam

Some of the Sahaabah were mushriks, then they entered Islam and became good Muslims, and they got married, and were not rejected because of what they had done in the past. Kindly assist on how to get the nikaah properly and how can I correct my mistakes. I had committed fornication in the past and i have repented from that sin. Leave it between her and Allah. Don't worry about her past and don't question her about it. Should I let my future partner know about a previous relationship? You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Regarding this question, we'd like to cite the words of the eminent Muslim scholar Sheik Yusuf Al-Qaradawi:. Stipulating a certain period such as a month, a year, or till the end of the study, etc. i loved some1 and he love me we talked 4 3 years and decided 2 marry, he spoke to hiz family who didnt agree at 1st they threw him out, i suported hm and then his family gave up, as he was an onli son they bort him back home and agreed. i told my family at 1st no notice was taken my mum wanted me to marry her cousin and they had decided this i pleaded cryed n did everything i could i rote and rote 4 help i tryed getting hold of a wali but no luck my tikets were buked off 2 pak 2 get marid some one reported to the police and i was taken to the station. i was emotionally blackmailed if i sed anything i wuld b disowed, i spoke up and they took me away 4 a nite, until later i was told my mother was in hospitle n was serius i decided to cum bk after a day my mum recovered slightly n off to pak i went along jus so i wuldnt b resposible, i had no choice got marid n stayed away 4 6months my hubbys half frm here and nos everything but sometimes i get this feeling like i dnt wana b here its been 3 yers n iv tryed moving on marshallah iv got a newborn baby but i need help to forget my past i want to no if iv dne anything rong i want the past to go away so i can move on with my life iv started working it out with him as hes reli nice and loves me alot gives me everything i want no mater what it is, my family rejected the 1st proposal because there not wealthy please help. Dont come near to illicit relationships, even if this leads to marriage when we are in 'love' we are blinded, we cant see potential 'compatability timebombs' or BIG problems which may occur. How can you be aware of your partner if you don't ask about her past, and research about her. Encourage her to go to the mosque for prayers, Islamic supports, as well as getting closer to Allah swt. This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. She just out for love went with the non-muslim guy, but later she return back to allah and ask forgiveness. 2. Zainab (may Allah be pleased with her) had Usamah ibn Zayd who was called the elect of the Prophet, whom he loved so much. Can I Marry a Divorced Woman with 3 Kids? Undoubtedly this is because the people have deviated from correct understanding of Islam and because they indukge so much in sin and neglect the obligatory duties prescribed in shareeah. She is emotionally depress now, sometime she went back to her normal state. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. Only consider who she is right now. She told me her story so that i knew everything before-hand, prior to making the big decision of marrying her. 1. I desperately want to remove it and my account. Yes I feel that too, find the whole prospect pretty daunting myself! We also use third-party cookies that help us analyze and understand how you use this website. Adherence to the teachings of Islam, doing the obligatory duties and avoiding the things that are forbidden are not optional for the Muslim, because these are things that Allaah has enjoined upon him. She obtained her MA degree in Psychology and has over 10 years of experience working in health and social care settings in the UK, USA, and Ireland. These cookies track visitors across websites and collect information to provide customized ads. Can a Muslim woman marry a Catholic man if she still does she is confirmed non-pregnant). That's not right dear @hope :) You may revise many Arabic Fatwa here: The verse which you mention in the EDIT, is talking about getting married to mushrekaat (those who believe in some god other than Allah, this is the Ishrak/sherk /), not about virgins/non-virgins at all, that's why it says until they believe not about virginity at all! Not directly related to the question, but figured I ought to say this any ways. His character means his attitude and how he deals and interacts with others. " (Surah Bani Israeel v32) A person who commits Zina not only gets punished in this hereafter but is also punished in this world. A Girl with Drug Problems; I Want to Help by Marrying Her - About Islam Former Mayor Bill de Blasio of New York City and his wife, Chirlane McCray, in 2021. she was a really spoiled girl. Would you marry someone with a 'bad' past? : r/islam But, if you have any doubts about whether the girl will be able to adjust to your home, respect you or your parents, I will advise you think about the decision on a deeper level. This answer was collected from MuftiOnline.co.za, where the questions have been answered by Mufti Zakaria Makada (Hafizahullah), who is currently a senior lecturer in the science of Hadith and Fiqh at Madrasah Taleemuddeen, Isipingo Beach, South Africa. 7 etiquettes of seeking a spouse | SoundVision.com and please do remember her in your special dua. Research, International So the rule of temporary marriage applies to the one who marries while intending a certain period though he does not stipulate it in his marriage contract. We would like to get married but my family are against it because this girl has had relationships in the past and also experimented with alcohol, although she has stopped. These cookies will be stored in your browser only with your consent. The cookie is set by GDPR cookie consent to record the user consent for the cookies in the category "Functional". Answer: She prays, wears hijab, and is intelligent as you said. Necessary cookies are absolutely essential for the website to function properly. The fact that the woman is older the man should not prevent them from IslamicAnswers.com Staff Photo Gallery. When i heard all these stories, I got more love for her. For more benefit, please refer to Fataawa 90234 and 87975. I wanted to ask where I stand and what should I do? I haven't had a girlfriend or done anything in haram. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Performance". But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. This opinion is correct in such a manner that this marriage is not similar to Mutah marriage. Other answers have addressed the muslim perspective but less comment. If you have repented and are allowed to marry a girl with no past, surely you can marry the girl who has a past WITH YOU and she has repented. She was divorced earlier so she converted to Islam and now we are married. Therefore, we support the opinion of the Hanbali scholars who do not permit this kind of marriage since it contradicts the objective of marriage. to bad men.". According to a hadith, narrated by Hazrat Abu Huraira RadhiaAllahu Anhum, A woman is married for four things: her wealth, her family status, her beauty and her religion. Answer (1 of 16): Yes and no. Stipulating a certain period such as a month, a year, or till the end of the study, etc. I also admire you that you are consistently doing an Istikhara and praying to Allah. Jazakillaahu Khair! Initiallly she was not ready because of religion, Can I be a 'god parent'? Site design / logo 2023 Stack Exchange Inc; user contributions licensed under CC BY-SA. Salaam u Alaikum. But opting out of some of these cookies may affect your browsing experience. From your post, I understand that you are attracted towards a 19-year-old girl who belongs to the family which has recently moved to your neighborhood. rev2023.7.13.43531. Child marriage is a marriage or similar union, formal or informal, between a child under a certain age - typically 18 years - and an adult or another child. Advertisement cookies are used to provide visitors with relevant ads and marketing campaigns. [1] The vast majority of child marriages are between a female child and a . Hotline, Fatwa Unlike the typical internet forum we expect answers here to be well elaborated, focused on answering the initial question and claims supported by evidences/references. It is important to keep in mind that although in Islam there is no objection about marrying a girl with a huge age difference,there may be issues with regard to mental compatibility later on, which may cause differences in marriage, opinions, and behaviors in general. Could you please help me what i should do? Us, Imams Questions cannot be asked through this form. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. Is it possible to play in D-tuning (guitar) on keyboards? May Allah help you make the right decision. All rights reserved. 7 Arab Muslim Wedding Traditions - Brides It important that you do not hide from your spouse to be about your previous wife and family as it can cause bitter feelings if they find it later on. what is the best age for girl to get married? Salaams. So when you;re ready (make sure you have a wali) search in islamic way - parents/iman arranges meeting. As long as you are ok with her past and she is a changed person today thats all that matters. Marrying girl who was secretly married and had abortion If he slept around for fun, no. She should have been decent and straightforward about it rather than putting you up for a chase. Post-apocalyptic automotive fuel for a cold world? Secondly, this should not affect a married life at all. I will be highly thankful to you. While you have matured with age, the girl is still young and may behave like a child. How do I tell my parents I want to marry someone else? The Prophet (peace be upon him), moreover, got married to 11 ladies all of them have previously married with the exception of Aishah (may Allah be pleased with her). if she wasn't virgin she must tell that and the words will be changed if she was married before, not virgin or not? Can I marry a Hindu girl without converting her and have lawful children according to Sharia? Why do oscilloscopes list max bandwidth separate from sample rate? The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. You are definitely on the right track that you do not want anything to do with the girl, lest you marry her. Dream interpretation on marrying a girl - IslamQA This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. http://www.marriagemissions.com/when-childhood-sexual-abuse-affects-marriage-intimacy/ then what happened if they said "she was virgin while she wasn't" it's your choice if you want to keep her or not, Islam gave you the right the moment you find that she faked info/lied, that you can step back and never start that marriage that you was about to start in the first night. Can I Marry a Divorced Woman with 3 Kids? If this girl is a Muslim and she repented of Zina and fulfilled the due conditions of repentance, meaning showing remorse, giving up the sin, and resolving never to commit it again in the . Other uncategorized cookies are those that are being analyzed and have not been classified into a category as yet. Which means: do not show your sexual organs, except for your married partner, and for those whom your right hand possess. Therefore, we do not advise you to marry this woman as long as she is in that state. So marrying her could be against her beliefs. I would like to know the reasons for making Zawaj el-Neya (when you marry a girl you intend to leave her without telling her that you will leave her when the time comes) Halal and what are the evidence from Qur'an and Sunnah. In this fatwa: There is no problem of getting married to a divorced woman who has kids. Part 3: Iranian Laws on Women | The Iran Primer Do I shorten Salah if I am in Hajj for sixteen days, Buying wheelchairs for a hospital with zakaat money. I just wanted to know what is islamic point of view on this. I got respect and from deep beneath i had respect and immense love for her. It says in Tuhfat al-Ahwadhi: The phrase if there comes to you to marry (your daughter) means if he comes to ask to marry a woman from among your children or relatives. The known opinion of the scholars of the Hanbali School is that the latter kind of marriage is also forbidden and it is an invalid contract. Now only i know about her, I am feeling bad not to help her and pull out her. Therefore, the person who does this commits a forbidden act. Trust in Him. Would you marry someone with a past? : r/islam - Reddit Good luck ! Subscribe yourself, one of your family members, or friends now! JazakhaAllah for your efforts on this site, you've giving some good answers maasha'Allah. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Analytics". Will Allah forgive me? I like a girl from school days, initially it was an attraction. However, she discovered that she became a nurse for a diabetic old man who needs someone to take care of him and support him during his last months in life. Just to add, you are not allowed to bring her past up in the future for or against her, unless you want to sin. All this may be slow and require a lot of patience. Or is it haram from an Islamic point of view? It is important to keep in mind that although in Islam there is no objection about marrying a girl with a huge age difference, there may be issues with regard to mental compatibility later on, which may cause differences in marriage, opinions, and behaviors in general. depends on the level of her "past" some men find it ok for the woman to have had casual romances with guysnothing serious or physicalsome men dont tolerate even that. This is based on the report of Jabir ibn `Abdullah. A "simpler" description of the automorphism group of the Lamplighter group. dont turn a blind eye to this issue of the past since its inherent in us men with varying degrees of severity. The cookie is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Other. Abdullah (his father) died and left behind seven or nine daughter, so I have brought someone who can look after them. @Shoaib, no it doesn't say "without anyone asking about it", this is your personal interpretation, it is an addition by you. Gracious, Most Merciful, Assembly of Muslim Jurists of We think ohh i love this guy, love conquers all, nothing else matters. I always think about her past and frustated. Us, Contact Give her a list of mental health clinics and substance abuse treatment centers. Performance cookies are used to understand and analyze the key performance indexes of the website which helps in delivering a better user experience for the visitors. Is marrying an orphan girl considered a greater good deed? The katb Al-kitaab is the marriage ceremony. If you have in the past been involved in relationships and participated in haraam activities and now repent your actions and. If a person has repented, his past should not be a source of shame and he should not be rejected if he comes seeking marriage. Is it Permissible to Allow Wheelchairs in a Masjid? Make dua for the best spouse, do istakhaarah quite early on if you can. It shows she is a decent human being who told you the truth. Try forget what she used to be and focus on what she now is. Is the girl converted to Islam before or after the Nikah? Mr. de Blasio's marriage helped fuel his campaign for mayor of New York, and his intense personal and political bond with his wife drew admiration and scrutiny. Marrying a woman with whom one had committed adultery (Zina) I fell in love with one girl and i wanted to marry her but she was a hindu. All positive stuff i say her. Inheritance split if woman dies today and child converts to Islam? The only thing i found out, which would be acceptable and which you could clearly do is: And most scholars say it's not allowed for the future husband to ask about the past of his future wife (see, On the other hand before wedding both (fianc and fiance) are. Can a anaf Resident Pray Behind a Shfie Traveller? We appreciate your keenness to adhere to the teachings of Islam in a society such as the one in which you are living. people are on more vulnerable legal footing, particularly . I have only heard of one instance where a Muslim girl eloped with a non-Muslim man. It does not store any personal data. Islam Stack Exchange is a question and answer site for Muslims, experts in Islam, and those interested in learning more about Islam. Disclaimer:The conceptualization and recommendations stated in this response are very general and purely based on the limited information provided in the question. With true niyaat i want to marry her in halaal way. We use cookies on IslamQA to measure visitor stats. I think it depends on the person. Are we doing anything Haram? Yes, iA you can marry her but please be strong and firm enough to stand by her even if your respected family taunts to you about her past to you after marriage. In some countries or regions there's a custom to ask the husband after the wedding if the wife is virgin this is also a prohibited matter, as nobody should disclose neither himself nor anybody else (especially his wife) when you are getting married via "ma2zoon" that's the person who's doing the marriage and officially getting it done, he makes the statement of "zawagtoka.el-bekr el-rasheed" it means "you are getting married to a completely virgin" and so on the other side? You never know what reward you may receive in return for this action of yours. So, apparently she seems very perfect to me and my family as a life partner. My parents want me to marry a psychologically abusive man, Boyfriend wants me to convert to Islam so that we can marry. I'm 29M, getting married later due to longer career path. Out of these, the cookies that are categorized as necessary are stored on your browser as they are essential for the working of basic functionalities of the website. Mother will not let me become a commerical pilot because I am a girl! So, there in my family friends (who my family just got to know recently), there is a girl, who is also a student of medicine. I think age is individual requirement. . This cookie is set by GDPR Cookie Consent plugin. So, the marriage of a person who stays in a country for a certain period for instance to complete his study, etc. Dear SH My greatest fear is this: when a abused woman starts getting intimate with her husband, she RELIVES her past abuse. Let the past be the past whether you didnt do haraam things or not do not hold that against her as no one is perfect. Marriage is considered as an act of worship ( ibadah ). Nothing really stops them if they want to go through with it. I'm in Love with a Girl 25 Years Younger Than Me Ask yourself the reason why you want to marry the girl. And the biggest thing was that she was in a HARAAm relationship with a boy. Reddit, Inc. 2023. Suggestions for Intervention. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. A Muslim male or female should not marry a non-Muslim male or female. I'm so sorry to do this here, but I could figure out no other way to contact you or anyone else. By clicking Accept, you consent to the use of ALL the cookies. Our beloved Prophet Muhammad (peace be upon him) got married to Khadijah who was a widow and he got married to Zainb bint Jahash who has been divorced by Zaid b. Thabit. Secondly, while it is somewhat understandable that you are attracted to her, you should also think that a decent girl who has appropriate personal, ethical and religious values would not make such gestures or advances towards a man. Functional cookies help to perform certain functionalities like sharing the content of the website on social media platforms, collect feedbacks, and other third-party features. There is so much confusion nowadays that a person who avoids some haraam things and does some obligatory duties is regarded as being over-strict and stubborn. Now she has none to say except me. We have been speaking about marriage. What if it was your sister instead of your girlfriend? And Allah Taala ( ) knows best. You also have the option to opt-out of these cookies. Your keenness to find a righteous husband is in accordance with teachings of Islam on choosing and marrying a spouse, but you should not reject a person who is known for his good character and religious commitment because of his past. If a Muslim woman does not wear Hijab while she is confessing that it is a Wajib, it is disobedience. The prophet PBUH said: "Cover your Awra, except from your wife and your Malakt-Yameen (right I was surprised to learn about her relation. She told me that she not always used to be like this. I was suggested by her through a mutual friend. Wa `alaykumAs-SalamuwaRahmatullahiwaBarakatuh. All praise and thanks are due to Allah, and peace and blessings be upon His Messenger. Some people propose medical tests, but this is also Haram in Islam, because this forces the doctor (either man or woman) to check her vagina, and this is prohibited unless there is a medical reason and it is required for her treatment. How Does a Muslim Get Married? | About Islam Find him in the best way - through family, and if familay are uncooperative then through an iman. While marrying the girl is allowed from an Islamic perspective, there are certain things you need to consider, which you may have missed out because of the strong attraction youre feeling towards her. And Allah Ta'ala ( ) knows best. Wants to marry a girl who does not wear hijab - Islamweb - Fatwas How should I understand the poem Paul Muldoon's Incantata? The cookies is used to store the user consent for the cookies in the category "Necessary". If she no longer has a boyfriend, she probably realized it was wrong. I feel bad to leave her in this state and the same time i am worried about my imaan as there is always shaitaan between two gair mahrams. Simple answer to this oneYes you can marry her..you are even allowed to marry a women who was a prostitute, forgiveness is one of the beauties of Islam. Answer: Zina (Adultery) has been classed as one of the major sins in Islam Allah Subhanahu Wa Ta'ala has mentioned in the Holy Qur'an: "Do not go near Zina for it is shamelessness and it is an evil way. It is not enough for a person to tell his fiance or her guardians that he has changed and has given up the bad and immoral things that he used to do; his word cannot be accepted and believed until there is the certainty that he is telling the truth or that he has definitely given up those bad things. repentance alike Islam effaces of what had lied before - but why don't sooooo many people understand that. Supreme Court Rules on LGBTQ Rights Case - The New York Times She was abused her her uncle. Im in Love with a Girl 25 Years Younger Than Me, My Wifes Young Age Makes Me Suspicious of Her. The girl left him, and another boy asked her to marry him. His mother wont approve of me because Im not Pakistani. I got to know about the reason why she fell for that guy, she was abused physically and mentally by her family members up to sexual abuse even. I have been spreading lies about my father, saying he abused me.how do I repent? There is a small thing, she has had a boyfriend before me. LGBTQ protections: Supreme Court says certain businesses can - CNN I don't like men who objectify women and use them, abuse them and then dispose of them.

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